Fry Sauce & Grits: The Six Worst Christmas Songs of All Time

Tuesday, December 3, 2013

The Six Worst Christmas Songs of All Time

When it comes to Christmas music, I think that things are black or white.  It's either good, or it's terrible.  I think we all dread hearing certain songs on the radio every Christmas Season.  In an effort to raise awareness, I decided to make a list of the worst Christmas songs ever.  I would like to suggest our culture divorce itself from these terrors.

6. "Hey Santa" - Wilson Phillips

Don't get me wrong, I love Wilson Phillips, but this song is pretty much atrocious.  And that hat?  Really?  I think we could get by without hearing this song ever again.  



5. "Grandma Got Ran Over By a Reindeer" - Elmo & Patsy
This kitschy song has nothing to do with Christmas. And why are we in a hurry to run poor Grandma over?

4. "Santa Baby" Eartha Kitt
Two words: Slinky & weird.

3. "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus" - The Jackson 5
I'm not sure when adultery became something to sing about, but here it is, in all its fine Christmas-y Glory.

2. "Little Drummer Boy" - The Harry Simeone Chorale
 There are no words...

1. "Christmas Shoes" - Newsong
This terrible song is basically the bane of Christmas existence.  While I do condone it for being charitable, it still remains an eighties-cheese-fest.  Have you ever thought that this song is applicable to pretty much any holiday?  "It's Easter, and Mommy needs some new shoes," or, "It's Halloween and Mommy needs some shoes."
To say it plainly: it's insincere and poorly produced.


Although these terrible six are indeed terrible, they might make for a good playlist at a tacky Christmas sweater party.

What is your least favorite Christmas song?

5 comments:

  1. My husband hates Here Comes Santa Clause. I'm not sure the reason, but he can't stand it. There are two I can't stand - the one by the Beatles Simply Having a Wonderful Christmas Time and the Last Christmas I Gave You My Heart song. Ugh. Except I don't mind the Taylor Swift version of the latter for some reason...

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    1. Alexis, I completely agree! And I do enjoy Taylor Swift's cover of Last Christmas.

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  2. Are you inside my brain? Seriously every horrible song I thought in my head, you put on your list. I'd have to say Santa Baby is the ultimate worst, with Christmas Shoes coming in at a close second. They both make me want to stab my ears out.

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  3. Aah - I like some of the song posted here - especially "Hey, Santa" but I am like you - about "Christmas Shoes' and "Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer" - don't like either of those - especially "Grandma got run over..." - cannot stand that one!

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